Celebrating in Solitude

Autophobia, according to Wikipedia, is the specific phobia of isolation. It is the morbid fear of being egotistical, or a dread of being alone or isolated.

Surprisingly, a huge percentage of the people in our soceity fears to be alone. We see this as dreary, depressing and gloomy. We are so scared of being alone that we do things that may backfire on us and will eventually make us feel more alone.

Fear of not having a partner is on top of the list. We feel that it's the end of the world the moment we lose that "someone" for whatever reason. We fear of being "partner-less" that we desperately end up with anyone who we can be dependent on just for the heck of not being alone.

We also fear of being alone in a strange place far away from where we're from. We are scared of getting lost without anyone we can ask help from. We fear of being friendless, thus, we go out with our so-called friends as much as we can. At times, we even excessively use all social networking sites to avoid the feeling of being alone.

Whatever the case is, the fear of being alone is definitely normal. It's fine to be scared of being left alone because as they say, "No man is an island". We certainly need someone one way or the other. Yet, contrary to that statement, we also need to learn how to be self sufficient. We need to learn how to live and enjoy being in solitude.

The joys of being alone are endless. I guess we are just too blinded with the idea of having someone who can meet our emotional needs; Someone whom we can call ours, someone who can give us comfort, and who can care for you.

All we need is to learn how we can cope with being alone. If it's normal to fear aloneness, then, it's also normal to be alone. Being strong-willed, self sufficient, and changing our mindset are the key ingredients if you want to enjoy solitariness.

Learn to find yourself in solitude. Do things you seldom do by yourself: Read books, watch movies, play music travel alone, discover new hobbies. It may take you a long time to get use to it but it's worth the effort. Un-learn the habit of needing someone to be complete. Remember, no one will help you but yourself in the end, ergo, start to enjoy being alone.

Celebrate life in solitude. We all deserve to be happy. :)

posted from Bloggeroid

The Perks of Being Single

Like what I always tell my friends, my trainees, and even acquaintances, "Happiness is a choice". No matter how messed up your life is, regardless of your current situation, it is still your choice to be or not to be happy.

One brilliant example is singlehood. A lot of you maybe longing to be in the arms of someone right now. Or, you maybe wondering as to how long will you have to wait to find Mr./Ms. Right. Some of you are perhaps mourning for being dumped or left by people you love, people you thought will stay beyond eternity. Others are wistfully hoping that destiny goes their way, wishing that the men/women of their dreams show up on their doorsteps soon. Sometimes, we even become desperate because of the happy-looking couples we see around us, that we start to be too emotional about it.

The thing is, to have someone special is not the only way to happiness and contentment. So instead of being blue, instead of being pessimistic, try to think about it in a different perspective.

If you are the type who often think of the downsides of being single, then, start identifying the pros of it. Being single definitely has a lot of perks. Realization is all you need.

1. YOU ARE READILY AVAILABLE - You can go out anytime you want, with just about everyone. You do not need to change your status on social networking sites like Facebook, Twitter, and Flicker, among others, hence, if someone likes you, and you like the person, voila! You can enjoy each other's company without restrictions, and without anyone getting mad. You can post multiple pictures of you with different "friends" of the opposite sex without even the slightest hesitation. Plus, being single means that no one will mind and judge you if you go out with different people.

2. MORE TIME FOR YOURSELF - I am a huge fan of loving one's self before others. Narcissism may it sound, but this indeed helps boost your morale. If you think of your own welfare first, your aura becomes more positive and glowing, ergo, people start to notice and will consequently admire you. You can have fun without a partner. You can make your personal appearance even better when you're single since no one has the right to complain. Best of all, you can save more because you do not need to buy presents for a partner's birthday, your anniversary, Christmas, New Year, Valentine's, or for other occasions you feel must be celebrated. Saves money, saves time, and saves you the effort of thinking hard, right?

3. YOU CAN BE A ROLE MODEL - If you have been in a not so good relationship and it did not work out, thus, making you single, or if you are single for what seems to be an eternity, then you can be an inspiration to the people around you, most especially if you remain to be tough and you are not affected with your single state. Everyone will look up to you if you continue to enjoy life and not be affected with the fact that you're single and you're friends
are not.

Again, it's a matter of choice and thinking positively.

posted from Bloggeroid

Motherhood...

Being a mom is one of the toughest jobs known to mankind... From the day one has to care for the little breathing individual inside her womb for nine months, the struggles of labor plus the excitement of carrying your baby for the first time, to the time that you raise your child.

There are so many firsts as a mom. Do you recall your joyfulness when you heard your child utter "mama" or "mommy" for the very first time? Or when your baby first smiled that your world lit up like there's no tomorrow? What about when you first saw your child cry that you felt you have been stabbed deeply by a sharp knife?

It is such an extraordinary and rewarding experience to be a mother. You may not get salaried to be one, but to be able to raise your own kid makes it truly an achievement. No high paying job can ever replaced the feeling of being a mom and being loved and cared for by her children.

Now, the underlying question is this: What makes you a great mother? Do you feel that what you do as a mom is enough? Do you feel that you fall short of your job as a mother? Because of the cultural and social differences of the mother's roles, it is difficult to cite a universal definition of what makes a great mom.

So, what really makes an amazing mother? If you try your best to be be a good mom, then for me, you certainly do your mother's role correctly. We live in a flawed world. Nobody is perfect. No one can be a perfect mom, but someone can be the best mom. So long as we do our roles as mothers to the best of our abilities, I would say that's more than enough.

A great mother tries her best to love her kid/kids unconditionally. Despite the challenges in life, may it be financial, physical or emotional, a good mother does her best to be there for her child/children. To be a wonderful mom, you have to make time for your kid. You try to make fun with your kids. You're not required to be there 24/7 but at least make your child feel that you are always ready to listen and will be there when you're needed. A good mother also tries her best to be a good example to her child/children. A mom should not really tolerate everything her child does, but allows her child to commit mistakes and eventually to learn from them. Best of all, a great mom has to teach her children to live life to the fullest.

To all the moms out there, you are all doing great in raising your kids and for trying to be the best.

Happy Mother's Day!!

posted from Bloggeroid